When you reach a certain age in life and you have been through some really hard stuff/experience, it’s quite tempting to just want to survive; to just want to get through the day and waking up the next day and wishing for nothing more.
But that’s living life the wrong way. In fact, it’s not even living, it’s just being alive. To live, you should want more than just being alive. You should want to thrive and not just survive.
There’s a huge difference between those two.
Surviving requires water, food, shelter and waking up every time you sleep. But to thrive, you need much more than that. You need to be smart. In fact, you need to outsmart life!
Here are just a few ways you can do that.
Be unapologetically you!
This is very important.
Don’t try to be like your best friend who always seems to know the right thing to say to people or like that actress who you really admire because she seems to get away with any outfit. Because, we get it, they are awesome, but so are you.
I am not saying that it’s wrong to learn how to talk to people and be great at it or wanting to look good in any outfit. It’s not at all. But if you have tried severally and failed, don’t beat yourself about it. That won’t help. Just embrace your imperfections and find those other things that you are good at and which make you awesome like being a passionate giver or a loyal friend or a great cook.
Embrace your awesomeness and those who matter will too.
Learn to say NO
If you don’t want to go out with your boss but you don’t know how to tell him that, just say NO! You don’t want to lend money to your friend who you know very well, will never pay you back, say NO!
NO excuses, NO lies, NO long painful explanations. Just one BIG firm NO!
There’s such great power in a simple NO.
Avoid the post ‘what-ifs’ and ‘I wish I knew’
So, you did something that you shouldn’t have done or said something that really hurt your friend and you are really tempted to play the ‘what if I had not done it’ or ‘I wish I had not said it’ game. One piece of advice, DON’T!
The hard truth about what is done is that it’s already done and there is nothing you can do to change it. But the best thing you can do is not to torture yourself about it, forgive yourself, ask for forgiveness and pick the lesson it gave you. Always take the lesson.
Enjoy your own company
Other than realizing and following your dreams, to me, the ability of being alone and happy is like the height of self-actualizaion.
Don’t get me wrong ,it’s not wrong to crave company.It is quite healthy cause human beings are social animals.But once in a while,it is healthy to go for an evening run alone or ride your bike to wherever you want to alone and enjoy it!
You will find that learning to be alone and happy is self-building and certainly fulfilling.
Find happiness within yourself. It has been there all along and it will always be there.
Don’t be afraid of taking risks
Here I am not talking about gambling with your school fees type of risk. It is more like opening that nail salon that you have dreaming of opening but you are afraid that it might not be successful or dating that guy who you like and who likes you back but you are afraid that you might get hurt.
Chances are that the nail salon business might turn out to be quite a success or it might not or the guy might be the one or not.
The most important thing is you won’t regret not taking the chance and finding out which one of the two possibilities it will be.
After all, one very wise man/woman said that the down payment to any success is risk.
Choose your battles wisely
Know which battles to fight and which ones to stay out of, which ones to win and which ones to lose because as I am sure you have learned in life not all battles are worth fighting and while some of them are worth fighting, not all of them are worth winning.
Before fighting any battle, just ask yourself, is it going to matter five years from now?
Take pleasure in the little things
How sweet of that guy you met today to send you a goodnight message? How thoughtful of your workmate to bring you some salad for lunch?
Be grateful for such things as small as they might seem and you will find that it will be easier for you to appreciate being alive and to love your life.
There’s real, almost tangible happiness in taking pleasure in the small things.
Stay away from negativity
Stay away from people who doubt your ability to succeed, people who always try to bring you down, people who don’t believe in you. They are the ones who are keeping you from succeeding.
Instead be around positive people, those who believe in you.
On top of it, believe in yourself. It’s empowering.
Give! Give! Give!
Sign up for a mentorship program at that local, go play with those little adorable human beings at the orphanage or go dance with the elderly at the care center.Donate books to the community library.
Be the sunshine in people’s lives and you will find out how much joy and blessings it brings in to your own.
Try these and witness the positive changes that take place in your life.All the BEST!